Commentary: No cheese needed, furry roommate soon gone

I do not know how much longer I can take the agony and pure frustration that I have lived with over the past two weeks. Recently, a mouse has decided to reside in the wall next to my bed. However, this is not your common furry little mouse that can be found in most Boston apartments. No, I have determined that this is an evil mouse with one goal in its pathetic life: To drive me insane.

Every night around two or three in the morning, I awake to the sound of teeth chewing away at something behind the wall. This is a sound that cannot be ignored. I can only describe it as being very similar to fingers digging into a chalkboard. It cannot simply be muffled by a fan or radio because it echoes through the wall.

I have thought about having a professional deal with this problem. However, my hatred for this mouse is so pure I am determined to end this mouse’s life myself. This mouse is my only true enemy.

So far, I have invested in two BB guns and four standard mousetraps I baited with Jiffy crunchy peanut butter. These mousetraps have proven useless. Besides being evil, I believe that this particular mouse was blessed with super intelligence.

Since the mousetraps have done nothing, I have been forced to move to plan B – I will hunt. My BB gun arsenal consists of a high-powered, scope-mounted rifle and a .45 magnum replica pistol. Tonight will be my first mouse hunt. I will turn my queen-sized bed into a fortress. There is no telling how long this stakeout could last, so I have made two peanut butter and jelly sandwiches in case I get hungry, and fully charged my iPod. This is war.

But life shouldn’t be like this; there should not be a constant migraine because of a rodent living in my space. What the city of Boston, and Northeastern, need to do is create a solid plan that addresses the rodent problems that plague this area.

But until then, I will have to take matters into my own hands.

– Peter Webster is a junior business major.

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